what do you think of marrying a man/woman who is younger than you?
Mar 1, 2008 03:35
  • CHERYL
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One of my relative fell in love with a girl who is nearly two years elder than him, and they love each other very much. However, they separated several days ago after over two years love, because my relative's parent thinks that the girl is much elder than their son.

What about your opinions?
Mar 1, 2008 09:18
#1  
GUEST12242 I think that your relatives are doing their son a tremendous disservice. If they really loved their son, they would stay out of his love life, and allow him to choose his woman for himself.
Mar 1, 2008 09:53
#2  
  • JABAROOTOO
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Two years is not very much but I have heard of a similar situation. Girls are often more mature than boys during their late teens through to thirties but this should not influence a good healthy relationship.

Of course if is much more common for older men to marry much younger women, up to twenty years difference..........and it is quite acceptable it would seem but for an older woman to marry a younger man is often seen as inappropriate.....

Why????? I have no idea....
Mar 1, 2008 11:08
#3  
GUEST11927 I think they should run off and get married. On the other hand, a man who listens to his parents instead of his heart is not a man....
Mar 1, 2008 20:45
#4  
  • BBQQ
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Agree with Jabarootoo. Two years is not a huge gap. There is a Chinese saying: it is better to marry a girl who is three older than you. Why? As Jabar said, women are often mature than boys. An mature woman is much like your mom. On the other hand, boys have Oedipus complex. They prefer to have a mon-like wife.

"Of course if is much more common for older men to marry much younger women, up to twenty years difference..........and it is quite acceptable it would seem but for an older woman to marry a younger man is often seen as inappropriate....."

Me too. Why can a man marry a very young girl but a woman can't marry a very young boy? It is unfair.
Mar 1, 2008 21:54
#5  
  • SHESGOTTOBE
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Love is not bounded by age, creed, nationality or race. That’s what I think. This is based on ‘my own little world’ where love is a prerequisite for marriage and that personal decisions should be respected. Having said that, I let people be if they think otherwise. All of us live in our own little worlds. All of us make our own decisions and we are all the masters of our own lives.

I’ve had Chinese friends back home who’ve been disowned by their parents/cut off from the inheritance for disobeying them or for marrying someone their parents didn’t approve of. They had a very tough time deciding and they really agonized, but in the end they followed their hearts.
Mar 2, 2008 21:20
#6  
  • JIMMYB
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BBQQ, you have done a good research. But someone tells me that a man should marry a girl who is younger than him but not too young, two years is ok. After reading what you wrote, I am puzzled. Should I find a girl who is 2 years younger than me or a girl who is two or three years older?

"Me too. Why can a man marry a very young girl but a woman can't marry a very young boy? It is unfair."

BBQQ, it seems that you are a feminist, are you?

Mar 3, 2008 01:09
#7  
  • WESTNORW...
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I dont think age difference matters too much, I once dated a lady who 9 years older than me in 1986, neither of us was to bothered by that.
I'm 11 years older than my wife Jing and she is not bothered by the age difference.
Alan
Mar 3, 2008 20:49
#8  
  • ICEBERG
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I am going to marry a girl who is younger than me, but not too young. So, I can take care of her carefully. To marry girl who is three years older than me doesn't work on me.
Mar 5, 2008 02:01
#9  
  • DESTRUCKDOZ
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Is it seriously inappropriate for an older woman to marry a younger man in Chinese culture? I have seen Chinese men who marry women half there age (my uncle) and it is viewed like she was just a few years younger than him. But for a man to marry a woman who is 5 years older than him, is that inappropriate? do parents usually have objections to this type of relationship? I would love to hear a Chinese womans opinion, especially if your 27 and keep in mind that the guy is 22 and comes from a wealthy land family from an extended family of powerful agriculturalists.
Mar 5, 2008 02:56
#10  
  • BBQQ
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Jimmyb, I am not a feminist. I just think that you men have much privileges than us women. And I don't want to marry a man who is as old as my dad. To me, a boy who is two years young than me is acceptable.

" I would love to hear a Chinese womans opinion, especially if your 27 and keep in mind that the guy is 22 and comes from a wealthy land family from an extended family of powerful agriculturalists."

Danny, the guy is 22 refers to you?
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