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Thread: Life, love, marriage. Making it work...?

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[quote=HUIXING,252121][...continues...]

We've also discussed marriage in the next year, not as a way to solve this, but because we want to. However, reading through posts here, it's maybe not so easy for us, especially in the UK. Even to marry in China and then go to the UK is not clear cut if we need to prove we don't need 'public funds' to support us. As I said, we're not rich and would need to work and don't own property. My previous salary was UK18-20k in North-West England. Added to that, me not working for 6 months means I don't have payslips which I've seen mentioned are required for the marriage/visa process. And finally her mother may or may not need hospital treatment early next year, around the time of the Spring Festival. Her brothers and sister are not in a great position to help with the potential cost financially and so she may have to fund the majority herself, leaving her with almost nothing.

As well as that to contend with, my lady's family are constantly asking her when she'll marry. She's been in BJ for 5 years now (returned to study Literature for 3 years) and says it's changed her and broadened her outlook on life and what she wants. However, her family remain steeped in the hometown tradition of females marrying before 25-28 and are always questioning. She has turned down advances from wealthy people for an easy life many times (tour guides get this often) as she won't marry for money. Returning home for holidays and festivals is not pleasant for her now, and although she wants to visit family, the constant barrage of "did you find a boyfriend?", "when will you marry?" really get her down whilst returning to BJ makes her "free". Even a call from her family can make her unhappy because she knows what's coming.

Phew, that's a long one. I'll be emailed when there's a reply as I'm open to advice.

Regards,
Huixing [彗星][/quote]

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