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Thread: Once you marry a Chinese woman, it is tantamount to marrying her entire family.

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[quote=GUESTSCOTT,623730]Part 1
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I wrote the whole post and for some reason the post never appeared on here. Anyway, here we go a second time.

I am a 47 year old male born in the US and still living here. For the past 1.5 years I have been dating a woman about 6 years older from Shanghai (needs a green card.) For a long time the subject of marriage comes up and I tell her I need more time. We has been staying over between 5-7 days a week for most of the past 13 months even I asked her to stay over less. Discussing that just brings on the tear works.

Last weekend I told her that I need another year before being ready for marriage although if even that will be enough. Anyway, she was very upset and cried the whole day. Before left for her job as a nanny where she lives there 6 nights a week, she said she would respect my wishes.

When checking in with her about her coming home this past weekend, she told me that instead she will stay at something like a Chinese hotel which is where she previously lived. She told me she will wait the year there for me and we can make plans to meet if either wanted.

That was upsetting to me. Processed this for days and came to ultimate fact that being with her is like sleeping and having sex with my maid. She does the cooking, cleaning, and the laundry. She is very good to me and I like to think I am to her too.

Anyway, sometime back I introduced her to a Malaysian woman I am friends with who she can speak mandarin hoping they would become friends. My friends english is good and girlfriends is not. Sometimes we can have a conversation without going to google translator (my phone) and not sure what she uses on her iPhone. So when I mentioned yesterday to my friend that my girlfriend left me, she was surprised. When I explained what happened, she told me she would be back and would push hard again for marriage which she did today.

Since I was telling my friend that my girlfriend left, my friend began telling me some things that my girlfriend had told her. Somethings were that she was upset that I introduced her to my family and still wasn't marrying her. She also may have told her something that she may talk to other men to find someone0 that will marry her. On FB, my girlfriend's profile was recommended to me and so I sent a friend request to which she never accepted. My friend is connected to her FB profile and says she is connected to many men who she is under the impression she is checking them out for possibilities while still with me.

My friend warned me that she is basically using me to get a green card. I like to think that we are both good to each other. The difference is my girlfriend says she loves me and I only like her. Because she does so much for me it feels good and I am comfortable. So last night trying to process all this new information, I began reading this and other blogs which I can only say has been very enlightening.[/quote]

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