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Thread: Looking for perspectives on a Chinese relationship

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[quote=ARTHURD,361766]I met a Chinese girl last year while I was working on Saipan, we have a pretty serious relationship but I had to come back to the states. We've been keeping it going online (I gave her my laptop for this purpose). I could take a job in China as a flight instructor to stay with her or I could sponsor her to come to the states. I've read a lot of stories and have witnessed a couple where foreign girls charm western men, marry them take a green card and very quickly leave.

I can see the motivation and unfortunately people use other people all the time so I worry about a scenario where I end up heartbroken looking foolish with half my stuff gone. Being in love makes it hard to think clearly about things like this. The things that make me concerned about this is she has friends who have done this or are in the process of and really early in our relationship she asked me if I would marry her or not and my answer was maybe. She also cheated on her last boyfriend with me while he was in Bangladesh, but according to her she never loved him and they fought a lot but she also described him as being a very considerate person.

On the other hand we've been pretty happy together and Chinese girls tend to only be interested in serious relationships with the prospect of marriage. She thinks Chinese men don't make good husbands (I also tend not to like girls from the USA). She was very upset when I had to go; all the body language is there (it's not just my opinion people have told me she looks happy and in love) and that's hard although not impossible to fake. I haven't seen anything inconsistent with a girl who is actually in love with a guy but I wouldn't be posting here if I didn't have some doubt. She wants me to meet her parents which is a major step in Chinese culture. We've had a lot of fun together she want's to have children at some point and she doesn't ask me to spend a lot of money on her even if I offer. Her family is not too bad off in China they own a house and some land and she has made what in China would be considered a small fortune from working on Saipan. I have seen relationships that are about money or green cards but ours doesn't seem to be like that. I know it's a bit thick for a first post but it's been on my mind a lot lately.[/quote]

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