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Thread: Why are there so many leftover ladies in China?

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[quote=KEVIN0518,499551]Leftover ladies refer to those well educated, well paid, professional and independent women who fail to marry by the time they are 30. In fact, it is derogatory term. I have also heard other notions such as “old spinster” and “girls on the shelf”. “Old spinster” isn’t a good word too. “Girls on the shelf” sounds nice. When we put something on the shelf, it means we play to delay the time to do it. Girls above 30 are not leftovers. They just delay the time to get married.

Yes, they delay the time to get married for a reason. But the truth is they are leftover ladies. Men including leftover men are seldom interested in girls on the shelf. If something is put on the shelf for long times, it might expire.

Roseann, an American girl who has been to China for four years, shares her opinions on those girls on the shelf. According to her, those girls should have more than five boyfriends. Why? There are more boys than girls. It should be easy for them to find a boyfriend. It’s true that there are boys than girls. However, it is difficult for them to find “the best” for them. Remember they are well educated, well paid and independent girls. They don’t want to find ordinary boys as their husband.

Roseann also says there is no “dating culture” in China. Girls one the shelf are very busy. Although they have their social life, they just confine themselves in small groups. They have dinner together with their friends and enjoy themselves in KTV. However, they don’t have chance to make new friends. Another reason is that their parents help them find their future husbands. Thus, they are not worried about this. Their parents arrange them to meet 10 men when they get back home for holidays. Eventually, they pick up no one to maintain further relationship. Why? They have too many choices. They can’t find the best from the 10 men for the first time. Then their parents arrange another 10 men for her to choose. They always think that they can find the best next time.

Is China lack of dating culture? What about online dating? According to Roseann’s observation, those parents of leftover ladies register for their girls on the website and start to have conversations with those men they are interested in. If they think this man is ok, then they arrange a meeting for their daughter and the man. It is not the girl herself who talks to the men.

Ok, here is another reason. Both Chinese men and women are reluctant to take the first step. Girls think that men should take the first step so that they lose many good opportunities. Why can’t girls take the first step? Men think girls who take the first step are easy girls. Why don’t men take the first step? Some men are afraid of being refused. Losing face is unacceptable. 
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