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Thread: Chinese Lack Confidence ?
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[quote=PINETREE,225364]I read an earlier thread on Foreigners and Chinese gals and vice versa. I was taken aback at the content of the discussion pointing to a 'lack of confidence" of the Chinese men for not able hook up with foreign women and the tone/manner of the discussion. I do not wish to particpate in that discussion as I feel it quite degrading for the local people. But I do feel compelled to offer a clarification on the behaviour of the Chinese which foreigners( esp the caucasians) termed as "lack of confidence".To me, the Chinese have a long cultural history - longer than probably any other countries in the world. Confucius + several other ancient philosophers came up with some wonderful structured ideas of how the country be run & its people behaved. The consequence is the long-embedded Confucianism which spread to even the surrounding regions like Korea/Japan.Some of the basic elements in COnfucianism are "humiliy", "consideration", pride & dignity - simply one has to be humble and be considerate & knowing the limit. As such you don't find the Chinese persisting in befriending others and insisting on getting their company - unlike quite a lot of foreigners whom to the Chinese are rather "thick-skin", we don't insist on getting a date from a gal. The Caucasians will not let go - they will sweet talk & beg if necessary for the gal's company. In most cases they are successful as it is the gal who feels "bad" not accepting him ! Some of these caucasians will show off their "catch" to other people - like printing some of such photos on this forum. To them this is their success. To the Chinese this is improper.Success at personal pride and dignity is not a prize a common Chinese man or woman is willing to pay.Another reason is that the Chinese don't speak a foreign language but are keen to learn. Coupled with the fact that they are generally MCP, it is considered not proper for the Chinese man to persist in dating a gal - foreigner or not. It is a very complicated situation - not lack of confidence. Rather it is "face" value. With globalisation, the situation will change. Confuciansim will be eroded/discarded with times and the Chinese will probably & hopefully behave in foreign countries and take their women like the Caucasians are now in China and yet pass such comments openly about them then.Wake up Chinese men and gals - please ![/quote]
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