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Thread: married guy dates a Chinese girl
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[quote=AMPILOT,358582]Thanks also to Marrie and "guest75103", and for all the others, you all have a good forum here with very polite and well intentioned people. I tell you this is the absolute last thing in the world I ever expected to happen to me. Some of you older folks, both western and eastern, can appreciate that a person's life goes through stages, with childhood, teenage years and schooling. Later comes your professional life ( whether you are a professional in medicine or a professional working on a construction site or in a kitchen, honest labor is always professional). Same thing with love, dating, marriage, raising a family, have your teenage kids drive you crazy, these are all natural, progressive stages. Mostly though you get the idea that these stages are like graduation from school, you graduate from dating school, now you graduate marriage school, and then comes being a parent school. Things go forward, they don't go back. I look at old photos of myself as a kid, teenager, early professional years, and I think, I can't go back, that young person in the photo is gone, replaced now by this heavier, gray haired man with a face lined with years of bearing responsibility. In particular, the dating years are over, I am wiser, more mature, certainly more experienced, and if nothing else, way too busy to have time for anything else. Or so I thought. Maybe this is a stage too that I did not know about it, middle aged guy loses his brains for a while. I am reading some of the other posts, young would-be-lovers anxious if their would-be-lover will call them, email them, what are their intentions, scrutinizing every detail about them or words they said or action taken for some clue as to how that person feels about the other person. And here I am feeling all of that, like a kid in high school all over again. There are times I can't think straight, have a hard time concentrating on work. The feelings of new affection are wonderful, exactly the way I remember them - but so too are the anxieties, the longing, the uncertainty. This part I remember too and it was not so good, its a little painful. The older person knows that the solution to making the pain in the head go away is to stop hitting it with a hammer. Yet, that wisdom is one I have great difficulty acting on today. The are only three things different now then when I was in high school. First there is a sense of fear - I could lose all that I have today by engaging this. The second is the secrecy, the secret email account, the secret calling card, the secret mail box, the secret voice mail phone box, the essential business trips that are not exactly very essential.. Last, I am alone. When I was in high school feeling the same wonder, the same pain, I had friends and my wonderful brothers and sisters I could talk to. Now, I dare not say a word and their words of wisdom I cannot avail myself of. This middle aged fool is bursting inside, thanks all for listening.[/quote]
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