City Guide
Answers
Login
Home
/
Community
/
Forums
/ Post a Reply
Post a Reply
Thread: Need chinese-american cross-cultural friendship advice!!!!
Title:
(100 characters at most)
Content: ( 3,000 characters at most, please )
You can add emoticons below to your post by clicking them.
[quote=GUEST73128,64894]Hi!! I am American and have had a Taiwanese friend for many years. I'm a little confused because of an imbalance that appears to exist in our relationship. For example, I have slowly realized that I am the person who always calls her, she never calls me, except to return a call. In response to this silent feedback, I have (sadly) backed away from the friendship and often have not called her for many months at a time. However, she often responds to these infrequent calls with intense happiness and appreciation. One time this happened and she told me (crying) that she was having a difficult family problem and so much wanted to speak to me, but did not want to bother me. I've often told her that I love to hear from her and she can call me anytime, day or night, for any reason at all. Another (less concerning) example of imbalance in our relationship is that when we had lived closer to each other, we sometimes agreed to meet somewhere at a 'halfway' location, and she choose locations that were much more convenient and closer to her house... her trip was be so much easier than mine. I wouldn't have noticed but it was very consistent and apparent... thus confusing and disconcerting. I am wondering if all of this behavior- this imbalance- reflects a social norm in Chinese society.. a stronger notion of respect toward a person who is older?? My friend is 5 years older than me. This is the only explanation I can imagine!! I wish I could understand, particularly with regard to her never calling me.. I need to know if I should continue to call... I need to know who my friends are!! Opinions/experience appreciated :))))) Thanks [/quote]
characters left
Name:
Get a new code