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Thread: Isolated and depressed foreigner in China
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[quote=GUESTMISS CG,476547] Hi everyone this is a personal synopsis of my current situation I would like to get advice from individuals who may empathize or be willing to offer advice. I escaped my native country to get away from an abusive life which was killing me like slow poison injected into my soul and it has been 2 years since I departed yet nightmares and depression plague me. I found a great job, nice home; colleagues are okay although a lot of prejudice and office politics surround my working life. I am one of those foreign faces you will not notice but the one who quietly does her job and respects this countries culture and values. I despise trouble and trouble makers so the silent one in the background is who I am. My Chinese language skills lack greatly therefore having conversations with natives is difficult but that isn’t the issue. I have many ex-pat friends ranging from architects, lawyers to ESL teachers and their social pattern is to consume alcohol in huge quantities whenever they can and cause a weekly saga which embarrasses me. I see how Chinese people will smile at the foreign faces and laugh at them behind their backs and I don’t want people to feel that about me as the saying goes ‘don’t tar everyone with the same brush’. I have found myself distancing from these people, nothing is wrong with what they do but it isn’t a social activity which I enjoy or want to partake in and I am not one to give into peer pressure. Besides I have know many alcoholics and watched how it has killed them and their families and I haven’t met anyone who drinks socially the people I know drink alcohol solely for the purpose of getting drunk and making excuses for their behaviour. I haven’t met many people out with my work environment who have similar interests as most are tied down to the family where as I am not. The reality is I can’t go back to my country yet as I have nothing and no one to go back to, family has disowned me, friends have moved on and we barely keep in touch. I came to make a better life for myself and was fortunate that China offered me an opportunity and has blessed me with things which I am grateful for. But now I am at a crossroads as I find myself staying indoors, I don't want to wake up, depression looms over my head like a dark cloud, people at work make things worse with their own agendas and I don’t know what to do. Do I change jobs, go live in another city, do I give into peer pressure, do I give into the depression etc. People look at me and I assume I have wonderful life only financially but little do they realise that in my opinion without the support of friends and family there is no meaning to life and money hasn’t met my needs and it hasn’t helped my situation besides what is the point in having so much unless you can share it. Any advice or wise words to help or knock some sense into me would be appreciated as I have no one to talk to which is why I turn to the internet. Miss CG [/quote]
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