| House or husband? | |
|---|---|
| Jun 25, 2007 03:18 |   |
 | Someone say, House prices are higher and higher day by day, while good men are less and less day by day. It's nearly a rule for marriage in China that the boy must have a house. Many girls will not choose those who have no houses. But, for young guys, to get a well decorated hourse is too expensive. Most guys just start their career. They may only afford the house until they are very old...... To be a so called 'good man', it is too hard! I feel so sad for this. Love has become the slaver of houses! I really wonder when house can not be a big issue in a family or a love relation! : ( |
| Jun 25, 2007 04:21 | #1 |
| The opinion that a good man must have a house is absolutely wrong. The good man should be those who work hard to support a harmonious family. The result is another matter. If he has strives and still can't afford a house, he should be acclaimed as a good man. |
| Jun 25, 2007 05:57 | #2 |
| Yes,my friends and relatives all suggest that you should not marry a man without a house. When I am reaching my age,I gradually understand their point. |
| Jun 25, 2007 06:29 | #3 |
| EVENING, Yes, I agree with GURTY. It really doesn't matter if a man owns a home. However, Chinese traditional views are much different from the west. Owning a home is an important component of raising a family. However, some of the minority populations in China encourage man and wife remain living in their parents house even after they marry. This is a great idea. The courtship can continue and, when the couple wants to have 'private time' they can rent a villa at Lugu Hu or travel together to a different city. Therefore, to answer your question, this a big problem in Chinese culture. Men have too great of a burden in having to pay for a marriage, a house, buying the future spouse gifts , like diamond rings, and other expensive items. Simply put, the man involved in a relationship with a traditional Chinese girl needs to have a lot of money, in addition to a lot of love. Maybe this a way of "weeding out the weak", but I see it as Chinese women pushing a matriarchal relationship, where they control their men's lives like a dog on a leash. A house cannot be a big issue in a family or love relationship when the couple decides it's not a big issue. A good man will find a comfortable place in society if he 'sticks to his dreams' and the woman, through not being so forceful, will be rewarded with, not only a good man, but a comfortable place to live. __WINDENERGY__ |
| Jun 25, 2007 20:42 | #4 |
| Of course the husband is more important. I can't agree that the family should be supported by the husband. Why not support it together? If you don't have an apartment, buy it together! |
| Jun 26, 2007 19:56 | #5 |
| Yes, May. " If you don't have an apartment, buy it together! " I can not agree with it any more. |
| Jun 27, 2007 04:03 | #6 |
| The criteria to judge whether a man is good or not is not to see whether he has a house. I think an ideal man should be responsible for the whole family and aspirant in his career. He must know what he can do to support the family. And of course, he should love his wife and children for ever. |
| Jun 28, 2007 03:48 | #7 |
| Let's do a survey for girls! What will you choose? @_@ One, a wealthy man with a big big hourse, he loves you. Another, an ordinary man without a house, but he loves you far more than the wealthy man. He is more considerate and can look after you better than the wealthy man. Then, how about your choice? |
| Jun 28, 2007 22:14 | #8 |
| When I was younger (and perhaps less wiser?), I said to myself that I will not marry until my partner (whoever it will be then) has a home for us. Living with either parents is absolutely out of the picture once we do get married. Well, obviously, I found the love of my life and universe, dropped everything and married him. He didn't have a house, but, he very well makes up the home we now have. p.s., We still don't have a house, but, we're happy and as blessed in our 3-bedroom apartment. Perhaps, just perhaps, you haven't found the one you're looking for, that you still can't 'compromise' the house- issue? Just a thought, not judgment. |
| Jun 28, 2007 22:20 | #9 |
| very nice Lujiazui. |
| Jul 3, 2007 23:10 | #10 |
| The world is always full of paradox. Someone with a lot of wealth , but incapable of love . Some with love , but lack money. Perfect thing is rare or never exists. |
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