| Proper gift for my girlfriend's mother, father and brother | |
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| Oct 4, 2007 23:38 |   |
 | I would like to give my girlfriend's mother, father and brothers a nice Spring Festival gift. Not too extravagant but not too ordinary. I have already sent pictures of the five family members in a portrait. There was one picture that turned out well. That is the one I sent in 8x10s. One for each of them. My gal's mother and father are in their 70's and I would guess her older brother is about 50 and her younger brother in his early 40's. Her mother and younger brother seem to like me; her father and older brother seem to be cold to me. I would not say that they "dislike" me...but they appear to be stern. I recorded my gal's mother singing and will make a few MP3 files of the singing which I believe they will enjoy. Unfortunately, I do not know that they have MP3 players. :-( I could easily buy MP3 players for all of them, but I would like to give them something nicer...something simple and wonderful. My gal's mother and father are not in good health, so a nice dinner in a beautiful restaurant may be too difficult for them. Do you have any appropriate suggestions? |
| Oct 5, 2007 12:38 | #1 |
| Ummm, I have no idea, sorry, good luck. |
| Oct 6, 2007 01:41 | #2 |
| Hey Griz, When I went back to Guangzhou I brought dried ginseng for each of my great great great aunts and they absolutely loved them because they too are in bad health. The reason for my bringing them there is because I can purchase these ginseng by the pound at the local china town, (San Francisco) at about 15 bucks a pound. I heard they were grossly expensive in china and when I did run into some, it was about 45-65 bucks American. If your cool with spending some dough, you could buy them some dried sea cucumber. Depending on there economic status in china, they may or may have not had it before but it is one of the MOST expensive ingredients in chinese cuisine (and cheap for us). That could be a problem if they never had something like this because there is a rehydrating process that needs to be done, and if done wrong, the sea cucumber could be more crispy than soft and tender, kind of tastes like pork fat. But it should not be a problem since they may know someone who has done it before. You may wonder why I suggested food items. I too thought of bringing material presents for the elderly but after some realization from my parents that at there old age, they are not very materialistic, unless you want to give them 24karat gold or exuberant amounts of cash money. Health foods such as Ginseng or Sea Cucumber matter quite a lot since they believe it aids in prolonging there health. Sea Cucumber might be hard to find in your area though, don't know about Ginseng. If your ever in SF, its as easy as finding the fireworks. And may I suggest Cell Phones for the brothers? I saw that everybody had cell phones there so a cool cell phone that is not available in China might be a good idea. I hung out with a bunch of the guys my age (21) and they all had Nokia style phones where they were awestruck with my Krzr, but if thats a little too high on the budget, Ebay has a bunch of vendors selling the Motorola w370. That model is usually unlocked which would work well if they are using China Mobile that uses sim cards instead of the CDMA. Hope that helps, If not I can try again. Danny |
| Oct 6, 2007 07:01 | #3 |
| Griz, I think that giving gift is no different in the East or the Wests, it is the thought that counts. Does the Father or older Son drink or smoke? Perhaps a bottle of you local moonshine or a Cuban but with a note from you in Chinese saying how much you respect their family etc. For the Mother..Flowers..Girls love them . If you do send Pictures, make sure that they are framed. They can then be hung on a wall immediately. You can then add a note on the back with your thanks. Dodger. |
| Oct 6, 2007 11:52 | #4 |
| I especially like the idea of the sea cucumber and the ginseng and may work for the brothers too. The brothers are not young men, they are nearly my age. ...and as a cigar smoker, I could bring special cigars they could either smoke or give to a friend. |
| Oct 7, 2007 02:38 | #5 |
| Hey what’s up, I do not agree with what Dodger has to say. Gifts in a way are no different from East or West but in the way one receives them is a completely different story. Giving a gift of flowers to an elderly sick Chinese women is like giving starving kids in Africa an Xbox 360, what are they going to do with it? Yeah they will remember you gave them a gift, but a gift that was completely useless to them. I am not here to argue that my suggestions are much better than anybody else’s or a claim that I know more because of my Chinese roots but you have to realize that if you are giving gifts to you girlfriends family or possibly even potential “In Laws” then you should give them something that they are familiar with in there culture. Gifts such as flowers, moonshine and cigars to a Chinese family from someone that is not Chinese? It is nothing but Ethnocentrism. If you want them to really like you, it has got to be something that they are familiar with. Such as the kids in Africa, they don’t know how valuable a Xbox360 is, so if they know nothing of it they don’t have expectations. If you want a long last effect on these gifts, they probably wont forget that you gave them a delicacy/medicine that they believe will make them healthier and live longer which I could even soften relations between two adversaries |
| Oct 7, 2007 02:38 | #6 |
| If the brothers are chain smokers, I am willing to bet that your cigars will be gone in less than a fort night. I brought with me some sweet tip cigars as presents and in a flash they were all gone. If you want to give moonshine, may I suggest a really fine Chinese rice wine? If they are like my dad (50’s) they would save it for special occasions (unless they got drinking issues) so it would not be gone that quick, and even perhaps they may think kindly of you while they sip on that. Oh and just throwing it out there, if you want to go for the king of Chinese delicacies, its got to be fresh abalone. I am talking about the huge ones, the size of a cantaloupe. It is illegal to buy it here in California, the only way of getting a hold of one is paying the permit fee to catch it in the bay which is a long arduous task and a dangerous one. There are unscrupulous dealers of abalone known within these communities and the average price of the type that I described is about 80 bucks. Ha Ha, if you can get a hold of some sea cucumber and some fine Chinese rice wine, that could be the nice dinner you were looking for. Oh and just to let you know, if you do decide to give sea cucumber, it’s a good idea to try to get it here in the states if possible because it seems that the ones available here are the best quality they put out to export to the US and whatever is left is sold domestically which I got a hold of some and it turned out really bad because of the dehydrating process it went through. And if I could make a suggestion on the pictures that you want to send to your girlfriend? If your girlfriend lives in a humid area, it is probably a good idea to get the pictures laminated. When I visited family in Guangzhou, they had all the special pictures laminated and the ones that were not laminated stuck to the other pictures or deteriorated quickly. So I hope nobody takes offense to this, just got to put my 2 cents out here so that Griz can get the family relations going on. Danny |
| Oct 7, 2007 02:51 | #7 |
| Whoa, I don't know what happened with the crazy second posts. I was trying to edit some words. My Apologies, Danny |
| Oct 7, 2007 04:31 | #8 |
| Danny, glad to have your imput on this post. I hope ther will be many more. Dodger. |
| Oct 7, 2007 11:53 | #9 |
| Thanks Dodger. Just out of curiosity, what is that pictured in your avatar? |
| Oct 8, 2007 15:50 | #10 |
| Can you get fresh abalone in China? I would gladly spring for that if it is a real treat. If you have a Chinese market I could call to or order from online, DESTRUCKDOZ, I would appreciate the information. |
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