| Is a henpecked man a good man? | |
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| Jan 9, 2008 04:03 | #21   |
 | And you comment Jimmy may be the problem of woman from the West. They may not know when to give way in puplic. Dodger. |
| Jan 9, 2008 05:14 | #22 |
| (((don't make your husband lose face no matter they are henpecked or not.))) As I understand it, ((henpecked)) really meaning is that, the man is a poor home leader, with a trainload of faults and not much to offer to a woman to be proud of, as a husband. If so, why in the world she have to make the sorry henpecked look good in public? Are you saying that she needs to lie to the world and glorify the looser she have for a man? |
| Jan 9, 2008 19:27 | #23 |
| I watched a court case file on TV about a tragedy in a rather conservative family. A woman was well aware that her husband has been abusing their 7-year old daughter but she chose to keep quiet about it for years. When asked why she didn’t leave him and took her daughter away; she said she couldn’t since she didn’t have any source of income at that time. Her mother-in-law repeated told her that it is her responsibility to keep the family intact together. Her husband said it is her responsibility to make sure everything looks good in public. One time, my ex shouted at me and yanked my hair when we were walking in the middle of a busy commercial area. I’m not saying this for anything except that we should realize that women are human, too. Please consider that they have pride, too. Not just men. |
| Jan 9, 2008 21:13 | #24 |
| SHESGOTTOBE >>Her mother-in-law repeated told her that it is her responsibility to keep the family intact together. Her husband said it is her responsibility to make sure everything looks good in public.<< Your post reminds me of a monologue in the movie American Beauty. The depressed husband Lester says: our marriage is a show, a commercial show, just to show how intact and normal we are as a couple. I don't know if you have ever seen the movie. If you saw the movie, you know that scene. The tragedy you described coincides with the issue in the movie. Numerous couples have broken marriage but still try to keep it look intact and normal. Why does the husband want her wife to make sure everything looks good in public? Perhaps, another quote from the movie can answer this question: (a real estate developer says) in order to be successful, you should maintain an image of success first. That's why many people try to make their marriage look intact and normal in public. The reason for the tragedy of the woman in the court case file lies in her complete financial dependency on her husband.(Certainly,it is nothing wrong for a woman to rely on her husband financially. If her husband is a responsible and caring good guy, everything is fine. Unfortunately, he is a merciless freak. A better credo for both men and women: you have nobody and nothing to count on but yourself. |
| Jan 10, 2008 03:47 | #25 |
| GUESTUS | Controlling a man is a hard work; I do not like that way with my lover. I respect my boyfriend, so does he. I do not want that my boyfriend shows his love as controlled by me every time. Maybe love is unfair, but respective selfhood is more important, so my dear boyfriend needs not be scared by me. No rules between us. |
| Jan 10, 2008 20:01 | #26 |
| "Your post reminds me of a monologue in the movie American Beauty. The depressed husband Lester says: our marriage is a show, a commercial show, just to show how intact and normal we are as a couple. I don't know if you have ever seen the movie. If you saw the movie, you know that scene." Yup! I’ve watched American Beauty. Even though it was a very serious movie, I was laughing all along as I was watching it because almost everyone was some sort of dysfunctional. LOL! That scene was right before he was kissed by his male neighbor. o_o Many couples tries to maintain the image of an intact marriage to save “face”. They would rather suffer and worry about what others would think instead of facing the truth. |
| Jan 10, 2008 20:32 | #27 |
| "A better credo for both men and women: you have nobody and nothing to count on but yourself." This is why I work. I don't work because of a career. I work to earn my own living and not have to depend on anyone. I have had people told me or even insinuated that women shouldn’t work, I already lost count. I don’t understand why they care. It’s not as if they are going to feed and shelter me. |
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