The tradition of asking for a woman's hand

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The tradition of asking for a woman's hand
Mar 5, 2008 02:06
guestIvory	Hey, I am a newbie here. I noticed that in a western wedding ceremony, a man asked for a woman’s hand. The father of the bride transferred the bride to her husband. When and where did this tradition originate from? Does it have some special significance? Do Chinese people have such a tradition of asking for a woman’s hand in the wedding?

Mar 5, 2008 02:22	#1
DESTRUCKDOZ Points: Join Date: Sep 30, 2007 Status: Offline	I think I know this one. It has to do with a tea ceremony where the couple serves tea to there parents and if they don't accept your tea than they are refusing to accept your offer of marriage. I believe that is how it goes? happened to a relative of mine, it sucks.

Mar 5, 2008 19:25	#2
SUNNYDREAM Points: Join Date: Jun 11, 2007 Status: Offline	DESTRUCKDOZ , what you said might be some things happen in an engagement(proposal) ceremony instead of a wedding ceremony. It is an old tradition. Nowadays, the custom has almost been abandoned.

Mar 5, 2008 20:24	#3
SHESGOTTOBE Points: Join Date: Nov 23, 2007 Status: Offline	Young man to a young woman's father: Sir, I am here to ask for your daughter's hand in marriage. Father: Which one? The right or the left one?

Mar 5, 2008 20:35	#4
SUNNYDREAM Points: Join Date: Jun 11, 2007 Status: Offline	"Father: Which one? The right or the left one?" Shesgottobe, is this a serious question the father would ask? What should the man answer? Do the the right one and the left one symbolize different meaning? It is very interesing to know the cultural things underlied the custom.

Mar 6, 2008 00:03	#5
DESTRUCKDOZ Points: Join Date: Sep 30, 2007 Status: Offline	Sunnydream, Can you elaborate on what a proposal ceremony may be like? if one does not exist, how would a couple go about asking for there parents permission?

Mar 6, 2008 20:15	#6
LEONARDO Points: Join Date: May 21, 2007 Status: Offline	GUESTIVORY, I searched about the question and hopefully it can answer your question. "The tradition of a man asking for a woman's hand dates back to a Roman marriage custom in which the father ''let go'' of his daughter and transferred her to the hand of her husband. An equivalent of the "letting go" custom can be seen in the modern marriage ceremony, where the father gives the bride away."

Mar 6, 2008 23:03	#7
SHESGOTTOBE Points: Join Date: Nov 23, 2007 Status: Offline	"Shesgottobe, is this a serious question the father would ask? What should the man answer? Do the the right one and the left one symbolize different meaning? It is very interesing to know the cultural things underlied the custom." Hi, Sunnydream. Actually it was a joke that I remember from somewhere.

Mar 11, 2008 21:15	#8
LEONARDO Points: Join Date: May 21, 2007 Status: Offline	Shesgottobe, does the joke imply the father refuse the guy's proposal?

Mar 11, 2008 22:21	#9
SHESGOTTOBE Points: Join Date: Nov 23, 2007 Status: Offline	Hi Leonardo! The joke implies that the father is testing how the young man will react. One, it will establish some rapport between them and should lighten things up. The father knows how tense and nervous the young man must be. Second, it will also show if the guy has some sense of humor since married life will present a lot of trials. ^_^

Mar 11, 2008 22:23	#10
SHESGOTTOBE Points: Join Date: Nov 23, 2007 Status: Offline	When the father asked if he is asking for the left or right hand, he should answer, "both"! ^_^

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