British gentlemen are disappearing?

British gentlemen are disappearing?
May 1, 2008 21:51	#21
BARONTWANGLE Points: Join Date: Nov 7, 2007 Status: Offline	Jimmy B. I don't think you need much guidance on this topic. Being a gentleman is more to do with consideration for others rather than manners. If you are considerate (not only to the girls) then manners will generally follow without effort. My mother raised to me to consider others all the time. It doesn't mean you have to sacrifice your own benefits, as contrary to popular belief, it is possible to be considerate and selfish at the same time. By doing something simple such as holding open a door for someone right behind you, doesn't cost anything, not even time (if the system works properly). One thing which I really don't understand in China, is why people stop in doorways or other narrow places to have a conversation or check directions, or read a message on their phone. The favourite place for Chinese people to do this is at the entrance or exit to an escalator. The result is that everyone behind then piles up and causes mass congestion. It would be inconceivable for me to do this, as I would automatically stand to one side so as not to obstruct anyone else. Drivers in China do this too, when they are not sure which way to go at a junction, they will just stop in the middle of the road while they try to figure it out. Why they can't just pull over to the side is a question I cannot answer. It seems no matter how hard Guangzhou metro (or Beijing Metro) try to educate people to stand on the right of escalators, allowing the left to stay clear for people who want to walk, the Chinese would just rather block the entire thing. The same goes for allowing people off a train before rushing on (even when there are no seats to fight for). If a English Gentleman witness the crush which occurs every time a train door opens, he would conclude that the Chinese are very impatient people. But then show him how they all stand rather than walk on the escalators, and he will be totally confused. It makes no sense at all, and I think it is just down to a lack of consideration for others. The list of other way the Chinese are inconsiderate is endless, but they are not necessarily rude or ill mannered. The Chinese seem to be very considerate to friends and family, they just don't seem to be able to extend the service to strangers.

May 1, 2008 21:51

#21

BARONTWANGLE
Points:
Join Date: Nov 7, 2007
Status: Offline

Jimmy B. I don't think you need much guidance on this topic. Being a gentleman is more to do with consideration for others rather than manners. If you are considerate (not only to the girls) then manners will generally follow without effort. My mother raised to me to consider others all the time. It doesn't mean you have to sacrifice your own benefits, as contrary to popular belief, it is possible to be considerate and selfish at the same time. By doing something simple such as holding open a door for someone right behind you, doesn't cost anything, not even time (if the system works properly).

One thing which I really don't understand in China, is why people stop in doorways or other narrow places to have a conversation or check directions, or read a message on their phone. The favourite place for Chinese people to do this is at the entrance or exit to an escalator. The result is that everyone behind then piles up and causes mass congestion. It would be inconceivable for me to do this, as I would automatically stand to one side so as not to obstruct anyone else. Drivers in China do this too, when they are not sure which way to go at a junction, they will just stop in the middle of the road while they try to figure it out. Why they can't just pull over to the side is a question I cannot answer.

It seems no matter how hard Guangzhou metro (or Beijing Metro) try to educate people to stand on the right of escalators, allowing the left to stay clear for people who want to walk, the Chinese would just rather block the entire thing. The same goes for allowing people off a train before rushing on (even when there are no seats to fight for). If a English Gentleman witness the crush which occurs every time a train door opens, he would conclude that the Chinese are very impatient people. But then show him how they all stand rather than walk on the escalators, and he will be totally confused. It makes no sense at all, and I think it is just down to a lack of consideration for others. The list of other way the Chinese are inconsiderate is endless, but they are not necessarily rude or ill mannered.

The Chinese seem to be very considerate to friends and family, they just don't seem to be able to extend the service to strangers.

May 1, 2008 22:39	#22
SHESGOTTOBE Points: Join Date: Nov 23, 2007 Status: Offline	Gentle + man A gentleman is so much more about opening doors. It doesn’t have anything to do with one’s nationality. It transcends nationality. A gentleman extends good manners to both men and women. A gentleman is magnanimous, well-mannered and sensitive to other people’s feelings. Very rare breed indeed.

May 2, 2008 12:45	#23
GRIZ326 Points: Join Date: Jun 12, 2006 Status: Offline	You do not achieve global domination with a country of gentle men - that's a fact. What is really being discussed is a British standard of manners and speech. Most of the British people I met over the years have ordinary manners; the ones I have met who appeared to meet the standard of "British Gentlemen" were ruthless cut throats. British gentleman is an oxymoron.

May 2, 2008 20:37	#24
DODGER Points: Join Date: Jul 15, 2007 Status: Offline	World domination Griz? I thought that is was achieved with smoke and mirror and a small amount of rat cunning. Add a little charm with a touch of theater, simmer gently for two hundred years and hey presto..one Empire. Perhaps I’ve been away from the Old Dart for too long, but I am sure that I am not the last of a dying breed. Dodger.

May 6, 2008 23:08	#25
CHERRY07 Points: Join Date: Mar 23, 2008 Status: Offline	I want my boyfriend to be a gentlemen and he shouldn't be too serious but very humourous. I've heard that the gentles in Britain are too serious. Is this true?

May 8, 2008 06:17	#26
WESTNORWOODGAS Points: Join Date: Jun 22, 2007 Status: Offline	My Chinese friend thinks I am a perfect gentleman and I as you will know have a sense of humour. I'm not a cut throat as Griz talks about but I know what he means, thankfully we are not all tarred with the same brush. Alan

May 8, 2008 08:06

#27

JCNILE123
Points:
Join Date: Mar 30, 2006
Status: Offline

(((British gentlemen are disappearing?)))

As I learned before a "gentleman”, title in old Britain was just that, a title given to royalty and money.

However, a British gentleman was nothing else but a cruel and despotic individual to the poor and low class worker.

If in doubt, we do not need to go anywhere but to Guangzhou, and let a local older Chinese to guide you thru the area where the British used to call home, as he show you around ask how life was for the Chinese worker on the days of the “gentleman’s”.
Be prepared, it is a poignant page of Chinese history in the old Canton, on the hands of the British Gentleman.

A conscious and respectful individual can be any one regardless of nationality, French man and or New Yorker included.

May 8, 2008 09:47	#28
MARRIE Points: Join Date: Jan 7, 2008 Status: Offline	agree with JC, it's like we see british gentlemen in old Canton province as gentlemen and western people see chinese as the cantonese or fujianese in chinatown.

May 8, 2008 10:19	#29
GARYKINKADE Points: Join Date: Jan 8, 2008 Status: Offline	I'm "staying out" on this one.

May 8, 2008 10:31	#30
MARRIE Points: Join Date: Jan 7, 2008 Status: Offline	what do u mean, gary. i guess your ancestors from Britain. and u have evoluted to american.

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