How to Tell the Sex of a Fly | |
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Apr 27, 2011 20:02 | |
| There's always one.I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was=2 0fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for 'Termination without Cause'. Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I know why they record these conversations!): Operator: 'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?' Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.' Operator: 'What sort of trouble??' Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.' Operator: 'Went away?' Caller: 'They disappeared.' Operator: 'Hmm So what does your screen look like now?' Caller: 'Nothing..' Operator: 'Nothing??' Caller: 'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.' Operator: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??' Caller: 'How do I tell?' Operator: 'Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??' Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?' Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?' Caller: 'There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type..' Operator: 'Does your monitor have a power indicator??' Caller: 'What's a monitor?' Operator: 'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??' Caller: 'I don't know.' Operator: 'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??' Caller: 'Yes, I think so.' Operator: 'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall. Caller: 'Yes, it is.' Operator: 'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??' Caller: 'No.' |
Apr 27, 2011 20:03 | |
| Operator: 'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.' Caller: 'Okay, here it is.' Operator: 'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer.' Calle r: 'I can't reach.' Operator: 'Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??' Caller: 'No.' Operator: 'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??' Caller: 'Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark.' Operator: 'Dark??' Caller: 'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window. ' Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.' Caller: 'I can't.' Operator: 'No? Why not??' Caller: 'Because there's a power failure..' Operator: 'A power.......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in??' Caller: 'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.' Operator: 'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.' Caller: 'Really? Is it that bad?' Operator: 'Yes, I'm afraid it is.' Caller: 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??' Operator: 'Tell them you're too f --- ing stupid to own a computer!!!!! |
Apr 27, 2011 20:54 | |
| There are always "stupid" customers who can drive you crazy sometimes. But it's his job to help their customers who are in need of help no matter they are stupid or not. |
May 26, 2011 21:37 | |
| Several men are in the locker room of a golf club.
A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen "Hello?" "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?" asked the woman on the other end. "Yes." The woman continues, "I am at the shops now and found this beautiful leather coat. It's a little pricey at $2,000 but I really love it. Is it okay if I buy it?" The man replies, "Two thousand seems like a lot for a leather coat but, sure, go ahead and get if you like it that much." "I also stopped by the Lexus dealership and saw the new models. I saw one I really liked," said the woman. "How much is the car?" "$90,000,” said the woman. "A Lexus for $90,000?” said the man. “OK, but for that price I want it with every possible option." "Great!” exclaimed the woman. “Oh, and one more thing... the house I wanted last year is back on the market. They're asking $980,000." "Well, then go ahead and give them an offer of $900,000. They will probably take it. If not, we can go the extra $80 thousand if it's really a pretty good deal." "Okay,” said the woman. “I'll see you later! I love you so much!" "Bye! I love you, too." The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are staring at him in astonishment, mouths agape. He turns and asks, "Anyone know who this phone belongs to?" |
May 27, 2011 01:30 | |
| Quote:Originally Posted by JETSETTER Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a benchrings and a man engages the hands-free speaker function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen "Hello?" "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?" asked the woman on the other end. "Yes." ... Ha ha ha , so funny! What a great feeling to spend money in that way! |
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