| Spare the rod, spoil the child | |
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| Aug 23, 2007 22:57 |   |
 | Have you ever been beaten by your parents? To tell you the truth, I have, but only once. When I was a naughty little boy, my father spanked my bottom. I can't remember why, since I was too young at that time. How many of you have never been scolded or spanked by your parents? Do you think whether it is beneficial to your growth or not? Acctually, we are talking about what the qualities of good parents are. In other words, what are the good parenting skills? Traditionally, in China, the model parents consist of "a strict father and a merciful mother." A father was expected to be hard on his children, wheras a mother was expected to be kind and tolerant. Most of Chinese parents stick to the belief " spare the rod, spoil the child". How about the case in your country and your family? |
| Aug 24, 2007 00:51 | #1 |
| I was disciplined as a child, my father beat me once but I understood because I had done something bad. I learned from it. Today in the west the children do whatever they want because parents cant touch them. If they hit a child it is assault and they can go to jail, they can not tell the child to go to their room because that 'infringes their human rights'. We have gangs of children roaming the streets attacking people because they are too young to be put in jail they know they will be let off. In England we had a case recently where a boy was too lazy to go to school or find job. The father dragged him out of bed and got him to school, the father was arrested for assault ans spent the night in a police cell. What is the world coming to? |
| Aug 24, 2007 01:58 | #2 |
| Leonardo, you were only beaten once by your father? You are really a good boy. Personally, I think the rod is needed. Words are not always useful. |
| Aug 24, 2007 02:27 | #3 |
| Yes I was smacked but I deserved it because I was naughty, I soon learned my lesson, it was the same at school where I was caned several times and I was considered one of the better behaved boy's, I didn't smack my daughter if she was naughty but I would tell her off, her mother is different she is less patient with her, my daughter is a good girl usually though. |
| Aug 24, 2007 11:09 | #4 |
| My mother broke all of the blood vessels in her hand spanking my brother and me...then she got a paddle for our bottoms. We were little devils. When we were really bad, my father would handle us. Spare the rod; spoil the child - ancient parental wisdom that is ignored today. |
| Aug 25, 2007 21:04 | #5 |
| But there does need to be a balance. When I went to school ( a long time ago) Teachers used canes, slippers, rulers, in fact anything that they could lay their hands on to beat anyone for the smallest of infringments and sometimes just as an exampleto the rest of the class. Most of the teachers had just come out of the Services after the War so perhaps.... But I have 3 Sons and have never had to lay a hand on any of them and they have not turn out like brats either. My thought are that parent should/are the childrens life coach. If the team looses, look to the coaching staff every time. Dodger. |
| Aug 27, 2007 04:44 | #6 |
| Should parents be hard on their children? Probably should. The ancient wisdom "spare the rod, spare the child" is still effective in modern society. There are rules in life. If you don't follow them, you will be punished. Rod is essential for sound growth. |
| Aug 27, 2007 12:56 | #7 |
| Wow,! "Beaten" you say? Sounds severe. I was disciplined many times by my parents, but never punished. The difference between the two is subtle: discipline is intended to change your behavior and is done out of concern for the child, but punishment is retaliation or retribution. For me, an easy way to tell the difference is if the parent is angry, it's probably punishment. If they're sad, it's probably discipline. If I made my parents angry, they waiting until they were no longer angry before disciplining me. By the way, this would include being spanked or grounded -- sent to your room without dinner or not allowed to leave the house for several days, or maybe no being allow to go on a camping trip with friends that had been planned for some time. |
| Aug 27, 2007 20:24 | #8 |
| discipline. I like this word. Beaten is not a catholicon |
| Aug 27, 2007 21:47 | #9 |
| "Catholicon!" Do you know I had to look that word up? It is not common, so good for you! You're some kind of English expert. :-) |
| Aug 28, 2007 19:49 | #10 |
| PETERJOHN, Thanks for illustrating the difference between discipline between punishment. "The difference between the two is subtle: discipline is intended to change your behavior and is done out of concern for the child, but punishment is retaliation or retribution." However, I disagree with you on that parents' punishment is retaliation or retribution. Parents would never treat you as enemy. The punishment is also out of concern for the child. |
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