| Is it so hard to find a husband? | |
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| Dec 26, 2007 19:30 | #21   |
 | can someone tell me if there is a trend in China of younger men marrying older women? there is this trend in some other Asian countries and maybe even Western countries. |
| Dec 26, 2007 19:59 | #22 |
| Quote: can someone tell me if there is a trend in China of younger men marrying older women? there is this trend in some other Asian countries and maybe even Western countries. Seldom. What I have found is that more younger women choose to get married with older men (usually rich older men). I really can't understand this. Why marry an oldman? Perhaps, they two are in love with each other. I have nothing to say on this. However, some of them who get married with older rich men have other purposes---leading a decent and comfortable life and inheritating legacy from her husband. They get married not for love but for money. Really sad to see this. |
| Dec 26, 2007 21:08 | #23 |
| ((Really sad to see this.)) How come |
| Dec 27, 2007 19:28 | #24 |
| "Seldom. What I have found is that more younger women choose to get married with older men (usually rich older men). I really can't understand this. Why marry an oldman? Perhaps, they two are in love with each other. I have nothing to say on this. However, some of them who get married with older rich men have other purposes---leading a decent and comfortable life and inheritating legacy from her husband. They get married not for love but for money. Really sad to see this." Sometimes I question myself, too. Do people really marry for love? We’re talking about both men and women here. I mean, really really? Or do they marry for something else? If one deems that a person is a suitable mate, having met certain ‘standards’, does that automatically mean that they are marrying for love? I’m kind of confused on this one, too. By the way, there is a saying in the West. Age is just a number. “Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” ~ Mark Twain |
| Dec 27, 2007 20:20 | #25 |
| JCL, I guess that Kevin is sad to see that some young women get married with old rich men just for money not for love. SHEGOTTOBE, people marry for various purposes, not only for love. Some get married for money while others for having a baby. Quote: If one deems that a person is a suitable mate, having met certain ‘standards’, does that automatically mean that they are marrying for love? I’m kind of confused on this one, too. Me too. Love is blind and I just wonder what is true love? |
| Dec 30, 2007 20:19 | #26 |
| Jimmyb, you are right. I am sad to see that some girls (especially beautiful girls) get married with old men just for money. Don't you notice that some girls get married with a foreign guy just for green card? They have no difference with those beautiful girls who get married with old Chiense men? |
| Dec 31, 2007 18:52 | #27 |
| You will understand it better if you look at it from the point of view of both individuals involved. ^_^ Imagine you are a wealthy man. Being wealthy, you are constantly surrounded by women, but you have your standards of a woman you want to marry. Why, you can afford to have high standards. She has to be very beautiful, young, obedient, the more obedient the better and of course, she has to be a virgin. You may not be a virgin yourself, aging even but who cares, you are a man and you are wealthy. Imagine the envy of everyone at the functions and parties when they see you with a young beautiful wife by your side. Society is in your favor too, because no one will question a wealthy man for his decisions. Now, imagine if you are a young, beautiful, virginal girl. You know that your youth, beauty and virginity are prized and you know that you will only have these just once in your life. Once you marry, you will leave your birth family and you are expected not to work outside the house. If you marry, you will be dependent on your husband financially. If you make a wrong decision, you’re doomed if no other man will want you anymore. Therefore, you will decide on what you think is best for you. You will marry a man who can support you on a long term basis and can give you a comfortable life. Does it matter how old he is? No. Why does she have to explain to people who don’t know her or she doesn’t know why she decided to marry an old man? Answer: She doesn’t have to. |
| Jan 4, 2008 01:24 | #28 |
| Well, I am not a rich man yet not a girl. Thus, I don't know what they really think about. What I said here is just my guess. Perhaps, I should learn to think about questions in other's position. |
| Jan 4, 2008 20:18 | #29 |
| You’re right, JimmyB, we don’t know what people think. And because we don’t know them, to be fair, we should give both the benefit of the doubt. It could be that the old, rich man is not after her youth and beauty and that the young, beautiful woman is not after the money or greencard. |
| Jan 4, 2008 21:09 | #30 |
| Some guys say that love can overcome any difficulties. Age, money etc are not problems as long as you two love each other. But I doubt it sometimes. Reality is cruel and we need to compromise and be practical sometimes. |
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