| Why do overseas Chinese men seldom marry western women? | |
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| Sep 12, 2008 18:55 | #81   |
 | If you live in a nice neighborhood and create a good learning enviroment in family, you don't have to send children to Catholic school. America is definitely not an anti-education society and its educational system and way of performance measurement is much more advanced than than in China in terms of triguring individulal potential talents and shaping healthy personalities, especally in Canada where real advanced British system of edu is well inheritated. Most chinese parents sing high praise of Canadian edu. system because their children benefit a lot. |
| Sep 14, 2008 12:21 | #82 |
| GUEST16063 | As a victim of family court in the state of Oregon, after having been married to the same women for 22 1/2 years, what you describe as being raped in the family court is what happened to me. I bear personal witness that you are right. Marriage may be outmoded and inauthentic as a means of conducting a relationship with a woman, and western women are to be avoided, period. A friend from Oregon. |
| Oct 1, 2008 23:25 | #83 |
| GUESTLUX | All american woman 22 years old..I have only ever dated Asian men, the one I am dating now still has trouble with english though he is getting better...I am crazy about him and he treats me like a Goddess...America is strange to him alot of times, but I am not....This could just be me...I have always been attracted to asian people...Also I am tiny, as someone metioned bigger white woman, I am as petite as they some lol....I dunno I mean American woman can be real snobs for sure!!!! The buy up everything in the media geeez if they only knew...hehe |
| Oct 4, 2008 15:04 | #84 |
| GUEST25169 | GUESTLUX, You are no more American than I am Chinese. If by chance your are American, you should go back to school to learn English 101. The give-a-way is your last 2 sentences, you are a phony and a fraud. You may even be an excuse for a man. |
| Oct 8, 2008 18:15 | #85 |
| GUEST11713 | You're a crock of poop. If men were anything but breast suckin' babies, then maybe a woman would keep him instead of taking care of him. You sound like you need a mama to take care of you.The reason why divorce's are so high in the U.S. is because men aren't men anymore. If they'd get off their arse's and work and not watch t.v. all day long and play on their computer's and expect the wife to cook, clean, take care of kids...oh, and not to forget about working a 40 hr. week on top of it, then maybe she'd be apt to keep the damn bum!!! That's if he'd give her sex once in a while instead of snoring and rattlin' the windows! |
| Oct 12, 2008 08:12 | #86 |
| GUEST19293 | Well as an American woman married to a Chinese man and living in China...I think Lenardo has it basically right. Personally I think most Chinese women are stronger then American women, I have yet to see a Chinese man as a head of the household. They tend to be more submissive when it comes to home life. BUT the problem is when you go out into society that Chinese women will act submissive to give their husbands face. This is not a trait that North American women share and the Chinese men tend to have a hard time dealing with that. Western women will also talk about their bedroom life to their friends which can put Chinese men off. You'd be surprised to know that most Chinese find themselves inferior to others. It's instilled in them when they are very young, by parents, teachers, and most leadership figures. It's a way to control them and their choices. If you don't believe that you can make these BIG decisions in your life then of course you're going to get counsel from those people you have been trained to trust (your family). Now on the other hand I know many American/ western men who came specifically to find a Chinese gf/wife and got married only to find out that Chinese women aren't the little dolls they thought they were. These women are first and foremost concerned with their status and what it means to be a 'Foreigners Wife'. That means money, status, green card, and someone to do their will. It is very rarely that love is actually involved (in the beginning at least) since she would be more concerned with what he could offer her. They automatically think that ALL westerners are rich and that this will help their family. I know a man who just got married last week to a Chinese man and she was VERY upset that his family did not present her family a gift...she said the gift had to be at least $10,000USD to give her family face. When he said that his family didn't have that kind of money she actually slept at her parents house for the honeymoon. BUT he had told her from the beginning that his family didn't have money but she wouldn't accept it. For everyone who goes to a Chinese wedding you should present the couple with a red packet of money. The Chinese 'brides' and their mothers actually make a list of how much each person gave to them so that they could know who not to invite for the next function and how much to give to them if they got married. Luckily I found a Chinese man more American then me...hahaha...but it's true. Thank God! |
| Oct 12, 2008 18:24 | #87 |
| GUESTSWEET ONE | I recently had a very pleasant date with a man from Hong Kong. he has been living in the USA for ten years. I was very gentlemanly and gracious to me. He opened car doors and paid for the movie tickets. he wanted to see the movie I wanted to see also! At the end of the date, he said he does not go out in public, stays at home. He never called me again. (I know he found me attractive, by his body language and smiles). I feel it is a cultural thing. I feel first generation immigrants feel uncomfortable dating/marrying outside of their race. I should say too, that I am considered very soft spoken and gentle natured. |
| Oct 13, 2008 01:50 | #88 |
| GUESTAPO | Because Chinese men have little to offer Western women - physically and culturally - most Asian/Chinese men lose out to the better build Caucasian men who are more sophisticated having lived in the advanced western society; and are better looking than Asian men. That is why Western women rarely take Chinese men as boyfriends, let alone as husbands. BUT of course you know these White men are so fond of Asian women many of whom marry them so that the Asian/Chinese girls can go to their husbnads native countries to get a better life and more money. |
| Oct 13, 2008 09:41 | #89 |
| The last few posts were sure full of generalisations without much substantiation! (Guestwe excepted) But as it's alkready sttarted I can add my own! G251269 doubts GuestLux's credentials as an American because of her misuse of English. I disagree, her 'English' is typical youngperson, internet style American, a language derived from English but something altogether different, most notably it's lack or grammatical rules. :) |
| Nov 8, 2008 14:09 | #90 |
| GUEST13178 | I agree that cultural influences to a greater extinct may determine compatibility and attraction between Chinese men and Western women. I am an African-American woman living in London, UK. I briefly dated a first generation Chinese from Hong Kong. He was one of the most respectful and attentive gentlemen I'd ever chanced to meet. We never progressed to intimacy as my Western "behaviours and attitudes" became an issue between us. He adored being the initiator and I enjoyed being pursued and catered to; however, as soon as I began to reciprocate (as I've been taught that 'balance' and sharing is good thing), he became distant. None the less, to his credit, in the time that we dated, I felt that Western men could rip a page from his book. I would definitely entertain dating another Chinese man; but perhaps one who is 2nd or 3rd generation westernised. ;-) |
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