| 2 yr old toddler run over in China | |
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| Oct 25, 2011 02:24 | #21   |
 | I still think those people who donated money to Xiao Yueyue’s parents are warm hearted. Compared with the indifferent passers-by, they at least took action to help the parents. The medical fee is very expensive in the Chinese hospitals. I don’t know whether the hospital gave free medical treatment to Xiao Yueyue. I checked the news and found that it cost at least 4000 RMB every day. Xiao Yueyue’s parents couldn’t pay for the medical fee if the hospital didn’t treat their daughter for free. Xiao Yueyue’s parents are just ordinary worker and they are not wealthy, according to the reports. Thanks to those kind people, Xiao Yueyue’s parents got the money to pay for the medical treatment. Would you appreciate a gift of money if your loved one was killed? I wouldn’t. However, I will donate all money I received to those who are in need of help if I received the money. Bobert, you still didn’t answer my question. I know it is unrelated to this topic. But I’d like to know your answer. Suppose your kid suffers from a kind of bad illness and you can not afford to pay the medical fee, what are you going to do? Refuse other people's donation and rob a bank? Or just let him/her suffer from it? Sometimes, letters of sympathy or messages of condolence don’t work because they can not solve their problem. |
| Oct 25, 2011 03:01 | #22 |
| BBQQ, The hospital didn't ask Xiao Yueyue's parents to pay for the treatment. It was free. |
| Oct 25, 2011 23:31 | #23 |
| Quote:Originally Posted by BBQQ Bobert, you still didn’t answer my question. I know it is unrelated to this topic. But I’d like to know your answer. Suppose your kid suffers from a kind of bad illness and you can not afford to pay the medical fee, what are you going to do? Refuse other people's donation and rob a bank? Or just let him/... You are comparing oranges to apples. The scenario you suggest is totally different from what we are now discussing. If I had a sick child and was in need of money of course I would greatly appreciate any money offered. That is help. However if that child was dead or about to die I would not want donations. That is compensation. That money would place a financial value on the life of my child and would be totally inappropriate. The prospect that others would think my spirits would be lifted through receiving money would make me sick to my stomach. |
| Oct 26, 2011 02:15 | #24 |
| "If I had a sick child and was in need of money of course I would greatly appreciate any money offered.” So what do you think of those people who give money to you? "However if that child was dead or about to die I would not want donations. That is compensation.” According to what you said, Xiao Yueyue’s parents shouldn’t have received the money because it is “compensation”, to your understanding. Unfortunately, they took the money. The parents took the money because the money represented those donor’s concern and love to their kid. The donors ARE NOT responsible for the death of their kid. Why do they have to compensate the parents? To not let the donors disappointed, the parents decided to deposit the money at the bank and let the media supervise how they use the money. See, the parents know that they have to be responsible for the donors. It is possible that some of the donors might be one of the 18 passers-by. Just pThey felt regretted so that they donated the money to the parents. But I believe that not all the money are donated by THEM. There are some other good and kind people who donated money to the parents to express their love and concern. Bobert, you can refuse to receive the money. It’s your right. But you can’t take all the money as compensation. Some people just use money instead of letters of condolence to express their concern and love. They don’t owe you anything so that they don’t have to compensate you. |
| Oct 26, 2011 03:36 | #25 |
| BBQQ; We obviously have a cultural divide that can't nether of us can bridge. I will put my case as simply as I can. People who give me money because I am in need of it are compassionate. People who give me money when I have no need for it believing it will make me feel better are insensitive and mercenary. |
| Oct 26, 2011 18:12 | #26 |
| Thats the problem anymore, that humans have exchanged the truth for a lie. Money comes and goes, the uniqueness of one child only comes once. I can see that people have a hard time expressing themselves and use money instead to be consoling. Although the thought of compassion is there, money is cold and hollow. All it is is a gesture. When my mother died 5 years ago, the best gift was those who came out of their way tired after working all day to come and pay respects to me and my family. Money can never do that, and is heartless. Our family collected nothing that day and we more moved by the appearance of many people. I cant remember fond memories of how much money i spent and could care less since it is a catalyst in temporarily improving our lives at the moment. Remembering a small hand from a child who held your finger when she was a baby,,"Thats Priceless" |
| Oct 26, 2011 22:39 | #27 |
| Quote:Originally Posted by BOBERT BBQQ; We obviously have a cultural divide that can't nether of us can bridge. I will put my case as simply as I can.People who give me money because I am in need of it are compassionate. People who give me money when I have no need for it believing it will make me feel better are insensitive and mercenary. Maybe, it is a cultural divide. But I am happy to talk to you about this because you let me understand how to look at things from another angle.  Quote:Originally Posted by LARRYBOY Thats the problem anymore, that humans have exchanged the truth for a lie. Money comes and goes, the uniqueness of one child only comes once. I can see that people have a hard time expressing themselves and use money instead to be consoling. Although the thought of compassion is there, money is cold and hollow. All it is is a gesture.Larry, it's just what you think about it. If you have a chance, you may ask those people who donate money to others this question "Why do you have to donate money? Why not take some other ways to show your kindness, concern etc " |
| Oct 26, 2011 23:55 | #28 |
| "Maybe, it is a cultural divide. But I am happy to talk to you about this because you let me understand how to look at things from another angle." I mean no disrespect to either you or other Chinese people BBQQ. I am genuinely saddened that many (most) people in China now believe that money is the panacea for all problems. It has become the ubiquitous preeminent gift for all occasions. Everyone likes money and there are times when it's a useful tool to express your feelings. However there are times when it is most defiantly not. I am reminded of a Chinese friend of mine who often asked incredulously why I didn't give my father money or ask him to live with me. He could not fathom that my father was a proud independent man and would be insulted by such condescending gestures on my part. In fact, despite the fact that he is poorer than me, he often bought ME drinks and paid for MY meals. He is the father and I am the son so he does not want me to patronise him. He would be ashamed and embarrassed if he took money from his son unless there was absolutely no alternative. Different culture BBQQ. |
Last edited by BOBERT: Oct 26, 2011 23:57 |
| Oct 27, 2011 01:08 | #29 |
| Quote:Originally Posted by BOBERT Typical example of culture difference. It is the children's duty to support their parents in China and it has been writtern in law. My parents have been working very hard to breed me from an infant to an adult. They are getting old. Now its my turn to support them. Even I become someone's wife, I will do whatever I can to support them. |
| Oct 27, 2011 03:53 | #30 |
| "It is the children's duty to support their parents in China and it has been writtern in law." This law was written to take the responsiblity away from the state and into the hands of the child. It is an abrogation and shirking of the states duty to provide for the elderly. Children do not ask to be born. A child is not a superannuation insurance policy. It is the responsibility of the parents to provide for the child. The child owes the parents NOTHING in return. Different culture BBQQ. |
Last edited by BOBERT: Oct 27, 2011 03:58 |
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